Revelations of Thirty

Oh, what a year 30th has turned out to be.

I imagined during year 30, I would have traveled a little more, enjoyed life a little more, kicked it with my friends a little more, have my first housewarming, and a ton of other things.

But instead, God showed me my MANY plans will never supersede His.

God reminded me that He is in control, ALWAYS.

Year 30th brought a lot of revelation to me.

My body was tired, my mind was tired, my heart began to change, and everywhere I looked I felt overworked and unappreciated.

This not only included work itself but each and every other “pot” I had my hand in.

I was too busy, I was overwhelmed, and I honestly begin to lose my passion for all of the things I once loved.

Truth be told, I NEEDED REST.

I had poured so much out to so many people and so many things that I was literally running on E.

I believe all of my life; I have underestimated the POWER of REST and SELF-CARE.

Simply put, I underestimated the power of just loving on ME but overtime, things just began to reveal itself.

From work, to church, to my business, to my nonprofit, all of these things involved me pouring out to others and helping others.

I loved it, but I was not properly prioritizing any of it, and most importantly, I was no longer consulting God.

I moved out of habit, out of routine, and began to leave my faith and literal HELP behind.

I NEGLECTED ME.

I would say yes to someone or something out of what felt like obligation, a self-proclaimed sense of objection might I add, and sometimes maybe even out of a “what if I don’t” fear, which also made the assumption I HAD to be the person to carry out the task.

The result of it all was BURNOUT.

Even as I write this, my eyes began to swell because for the longest time, I just couldn’t see it, but I KNEW I did not like how or what I felt.

So, the time came to step away from it all. I know, for some, sounds crazy right? If you know me, know me, you know that above all else, I serve.

But what happens when you serve so much that you have absolutely nothing left to give?

Ultimately, you become useless. NOT in a literal sense, but physically, mentally, and emotionally, you’re no good.

My Pastor has said it often, you cannot pour from an empty cup, and almost ANY therapist will tell you the exact same thing.

As a matter of fact, Mark 2:21-22 The Passion Translation says this, “And who would mend worn-out clothing with new fabric? When the new cloth shrinks, it will rip, making the tear worse than before. And who would pour fresh, new wine into an old wineskin? Eventually the wine will ferment and make the wineskin burst, losing everything—the wine will be spilled, and the wineskin ruined. Instead, new wine is always poured into new wineskins.”

Relatively speaking, we become NEW again, through REST!

So, let’s talk about a few ways we can maintain our overall health and not pour from an empty cup, not just for the sake of others, but more importantly for OURSELVES.

NO. Exercise your RIGHT to SAY NO.

If you do not feel like it, if you do not have the capacity, or whatever the case may be, there is power in saying NO. You do not have to be available for everyone and everything. NO IS A FULL SENTENCE.

SLEEP, SLEEP, SLEEP.

Not only does our body recharge from sleep, but it also naturally HEALS itself with the proper rest. The stillness of the body is truly a beautiful thing and we should use it to our advantage. PROPER REST is at least EIGHT hours of sleep every night.

Dedicate one day to YOURSELF a week.

This one is simple, set a day where you can simply be where you want and do what you want without the pressure of having to work or keep busy. During this day, you should also, UNPLUG from that cellular device that remains stuck to your hand. NO SOCIAL MEDIA.

SELF-CARE is NECESSARY.

In theory, this one can be combined with the one above, but find an activity or activities that you can enjoy that help you recharge. SELF-CARE IS DOING SOMETHING FOR YOU and ONLY YOU. Do NOT NEGLECT it. It can literally be anything as long as it’s not WORK related.

Get a Therapist.

I know your friends and family are AWESOME, but they do not have the capacity to carry every single thing in your life and neither do you! FIND SOMEONE to talk to who will give you’re their expert and unbiased opinions and tools needed to become the BEST version of you.

PRIORITIZE.

Balance does not exist, balance does not exist, balance does not exist. Let go of that theory now because trying to find balance instead of prioritizing will do your body more harm than good. Everything is not an emergency, and someone else’s emergency does not have to be yours. SERIOUSLY.

Ask for Help.

NEVER UNDERESTIMATE the power in asking for help! We are not superhero’s and we were not placed on this Earth to do life alone. Ask for help. It shows humility. Find a mentor. Find an expert in your field. Use your support system.